What does Christmas mean... to me?

This is such a personal and specific thing and I am not sure if it can even be summed up in words honestly, but I can try to explain what Christmas means to me.
Christmas is a celebration of an event that all creation waited for, was created for, and remembers still to this very day. Scripture points to the coming of the King, the arrival of the king, and was forever changed because of it. It amazes me because of God's sovereign plan to redeem mankind and make a way for us to have access to him, in spite of our humanity and it can all be summed up in Jesus. The birth of Jesus was God's plan unfolding for all the world to embrace His love and mercy through the life of the Savior. When I think about what it means to me personally it just amazes me. I feel like in my heart I have the same reaction of "awe" as most of those who heard of the birth, who witnessed the birth, and who waited for the King's arrival and all I can do is respond in humble adoration bringing to Him all that I am. I believe that worship plus devotion in daily life will overall describe what Christmas means to me. As I think about Mary and Joseph and many of the other individuals who had such a tight knit relationship with God that they received revelation and took abandoned steps of obedience to God no matter what risks surrounded them, I am completely challenged. They were ordinary people just like I am and we probably have many of the same struggles, especially when stepping into the realm of the unfamiliar. You see that they gave their lives completely to God, even the things they didn't understand. Mary never prayed to fully understand God's plan, she just accepted what He spoke and followed through. Then Joseph who could have escaped the whole scenario considering Jesus wasn't typically his, but He stayed. He accepted the God's purpose without 100% knowing what it would cost him, but every time God revealed his direction in a dream, Joseph obeyed. Mary and Joseph are examples of those who are completely consumed with God and wrapped up in His plan. It challenges me to never hesitate to give all that I am to God for his cause, even when I don't understand. It challenges me to see with eyes of faith instead of only the things I can comprehend. It challenges me to cause my entire life to be about the King and determined by Him.
As we remember that God sent His son to save a lost, broken world in need of a Savior, let's be willing to be sent out from where we are so that they world may know him. There are no limitations on who God uses in the sending; he used a girl in the least likely of conditions to usher in the greatest gift of all... Immanuel.

Women or Worth-Uganda 2010

What do you do with your Wal-Mart bag?

Shhhhhhhhhh.... It's a secret

I can't help but to wonder about the remote or not so remote places in the world where Christianity is not allowed and if it is allowed, it's only allowed with extreme isolation and persecution. Yesterday I was reading about a church in Asia that quickly caught my attention. The church I read about captivated my thinking because it consisted of a group of about 20 leaders who gathered together in secret to study the word of God and to be further equipped to carry out the will of God in their lives and in their community. In this part of Asia it is illegal to gather together with these kind of intentions, in this type of atmosphere.. but they did it anyway. I read that each individual traveled at different times of the day, not by an SUV or car, but by foot and on bike. They each came at different times so that it wouldn't be obvious that they were gathering together for such event. The leaders shared stories of their churches and wanted strength to equip Christians that God had placed under their leadership. The leaders needed to know how to equip the saints to endure opposition from cults that persecuted Christians. One woman leader said this: "I need to know how to lead my church, even if it costs them everything." Needless to say, people in her church were losing their lives and facing persecution from government officials...because they followed Christ.  Hearing this story, which contained even more graphic details, literally clenched my heart and the Holy Spirit begin to speak....


Somewhere there are people in this world who left their jobs, communities, family, and safety to walk miles upon miles to get to a "hidden church". Their fellowship cost them something, their worship cost them something, their studying of the word cost them something. It could have cost them all they had....their very life.


It's amazing to me, that when following God means so much to you, you will risk anything & everything to know Him and to spread His gospel. I'm thankful that we don't face that kind of persecution in our country and that we can freely come together as believers and freely speak about God, but I want it to cost me something. A life to one person may be different to another person. To one it may be your life to another it may be selfishness, pride, time, or money. Jesus is worth everything, no matter what it is. Worth cannot be compartmentalized and if it is, then it's not worth much. Abandonment to God cannot be bargained, but comes at one price alone. I am thankful that Jesus did not bargain my worth, but paid it in full with His life, so that I could have life. Love has no limits on the amount it gives. That's what the love of Christ shows us, that He gives and loves all with no conditions. It's easy to ask God to speak..... with our terms and conditions, but God wants us to live outside of "ourselves" per say and in doing that God has to speak to us outside of our ideals and regulations. What I mean by that is "God I will do this.. if", I will give you everything if I know ______", if you give me a raise, I will give to those in need. But thankfully our infinite, all knowing, all powerful, God is so much bigger and doesn't work according to our terms and conditions....because we would definitely be in trouble. (In reality we are so tiny in comparison to Him).


I have heard stories and read stories of Muslim people who encountered for the first time a man named Jesus who was not some "far off god" but was a personal Father and Savior from all sin, and after revelation of this truth literally gave up everything . See in their culture, to follow Islamic law and all the details brings great honor to your family. To deny it brings extreme dishonor to both family, country, and their god. Muslim people who have encountered God and decided to follow Jesus, have faced extreme persecution and exile from their family. See, the scripture in Luke (14:26-27) that says, "If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters—yes, even his own life—he cannot be my disciple. And anyone who does not carry his cross and follow me cannot be my disciple. In this very same teaching to the crowd of people, Jesus tells them in a parable to first count the cost before building to see if the task can be completed. That scripture to them, means everything. Honoring your family is a big deal in the Islamic society but when they meet Jesus they give up what they have understood as value, ideals, rules, & regulations their entire life.. so that they can pursue Him daily into an unknown faith.
The chance of knowing a personal savior in comparison to the risk of dishonoring their family and forsaking all they knew was worth it, because to them Jesus is worth it. 


Then you hear about the Christians in Nigeria who live in a constant struggle to be able to practice their faith. They struggle against their Muslim neighbors who don't want them evangelizing the gospel of Christ. The struggles isn't 'name calling' or simple things like that, but their churches are being burned down and people are facing a brutal death... all in order to practice their faith. 


All these people have one thing in common, being with Jesus may cost them their very life, but to them it's worth it. How amazing that the spirit of God is moving on the hearts of people in all nations among all people.
His love, grace, and call to follow is being spread in all places!!!! 


In Acts 20 when Paul was talking to the Ephesian church leaders, He knew the Holy Spirit was leading Him to Jerusalem  and he also knew that he would face persecution there. But Paul said these profound words that came from his abandoned heart in a sold out relationship with Christ...."I only know that in every city the Holy Spirit warns me that prison and hardships are facing me. However, I consider my life worth nothing to me, if only I may finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me—the task of testifying to the gospel of God's grace."

• Let our lives cost us something, because HE is worth it.
• Be consumed and driven by the love, grace, purpose, direction and heart of God. 
• Pray for the people who face and endure persecution because of their faith and who live in this kind of bondage, that God would give them strength and empower them, and that people all over would receive a revelation of who He is. 
• Pray for Uganda as they have recently been attacked! Pray for the peace of God and restoration in the country as well as a stepping out of the leadership! 

And for us, let's not settle for normal, mundane, but allow God to take inventory of our lives and hearts so that our life can become more of a reflection of Him!


These are realities that people all over the world face to know Jesus. These things here really amaze me and shake me up!
Sometimes we can hear or read a scripture so much that it loses it's powerful meaning and challenging ability (when we allow it to), but here is one scripture to sum it all up:


2 Samuel 24:24
David says as he builds an altar to God:
"nor will I offer burnt offerings to the LORD my God with that which costs me nothing."


Rather than living a life of comfort and stability let's dare to live a life of passion and pursuit of following our Savior! 
Below are some links to some videos I encourage you to watch...
one is about the Nigeria churches and persecution..
the other is about a woman(Bilquis Sheikh) who grew up in a prominent Muslim family in Pakistan and began to encounter Jesus and faced hardships due to practicing her faith.... very powerful!!

Victims in Nigeria
Bilquis Sheikh

How far will you follow me?

God is always asking, will you follow me and if so how far? By looking at the life of Peter, we see that Jesus was always asking Him, how far will you follow me. First of all when Jesus called the disciples, He asked them (Peter included) to give up their jobs in order to become His disciple or follower. A job isn't just a job but a source of provision, comfort, and for men in that time it can be a form of identity. So Peter dropped his nets and followed after Jesus. As Jesus was walking beside the Sea of Galilee, he saw two brothers, Simon called Peter and his brother Andrew. They were casting a net into the lake, for they were fishermen. "Come, follow me," Jesus said, "and I will make you fishers of men." At once they left their nets and followed him. Matthew 4:18  Another time Jesus asked the question "how far will you follow me", was when he asked Peter to step out on the boat. Matthew 14:25-29 During the fourth watch of the night Jesus went out to them, walking on the lake. When the disciples saw him walking on the lake, they were terrified. "It's a ghost," they said, and cried out in fear.But Jesus immediately said to them: "Take courage! It is I. Don't be afraid."Lord, if it's you," Peter replied, "tell me to come to you on the water."Come," he said.   Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, "Lord, save me!" In our relationship with God we are asked often times to venture into the unknown like Peter was when he was asked to walk on water. We are sometimes asked to do things that with our all natural eyes look and seem humanly impossible. The most amazing thing about this event that took place is what Peter said. When He said, Lord if it's you, I'll come, He was declaring that no matter what it looked like, felt like, how unknown and no matter how afraid he may be THAT because Jesus bid Him come and because Jesus was on the water then He could step out of the known into the unknown. The unknown will always seem fearful unless you step out with the One you know. The only hope that Peter had in this situation, was that the One He knew was on the standing on the water. Peter had several firsthand experiences with Jesus, meaning He had personally been with Jesus as He had fed the multitude, healed the sick, raised the dead, spoken truth to the blind, crossed cultural boundaries, and even watched him escape it all to pray to His father. Peter experienced it firsthand and had a knowing of Christ, so when Jesus responded "It is I"... although everyone else was afraid, Peter stepped out of the boat because He knew Jesus. As followers of Christ, we too experience Jesus firsthand through a daily relationship with Him: we know Him, when He calls, when He speaks, when He leads, and when He whispers  his amazing love to us. The sheep know His voice. Sometimes like Peter, we see our "very known" personal Savior in an unknown place asking us how far we will follow him. When we know it's him, even if we sink he holds us up, because He is faithful to those who follow him in obedience. When Jesus asks how far will you follow me, it's a matter of trust. Will you trust like Peter did, even in the unknown, that He will hold you up? It's greater to be in the unknown with the one you know than rather than being in the known without Him. Trust the One you know and where He has led you this far, even when you face the unknown. The unknown changes, the known changes because they are just circumstances..but Jesus (who you know), will never change. What he speaks is sovereign, and where He leads is for divine purpose. God always asks to His children how far will you follow me and how much will you trust me? He asks us this because he loves us and desires that we all grow closer to Him in our own life and so His will can be at constant work through us. A lot of times we pray for greater things in God and that greater can come as the unknown where we have to take a blind leap into the loving arms of our Savior. Trust is defined in a very broad way, but I like to think of it as this in my relationship with God: With all that I am rely on all that He is, and He is always more than enough. So when Jesus asks, how far.... follow Him farther because He knows every step of the journey in our lives and whether this is the first step of salvation or the step to walk in a specific calling, God is still leading and directing every step and He knows what we can't quite see yet. The plans He wants to fulfill through those He created are amazing, and He asks us to follow Him in loving obedience and the best response is more than a yes, but an actual step. 

All around we are facing unknown circumstances in our society and in this specific time in history. Whether it's economic trouble, family problems, and the list could go on and on  because that's what circumstances do... but today, trust the one you know with all that you are despite what everything else looks like. 
 I would encourage you to read Matthew chapter 14 and today don't put a limit on how far you follow Jesus, but follow  Him, fully abandoned with a loving heart. Don't stay in the boat, but go where He is.

Dinner with a sinner

Jesus said, "It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick......For I have not come to call the righteous, but the sinners." Matthew 9:12. In this moment of  Jesus' mission, He and his disciples were eating with tax collectors and 'sinners'. This specific dinner apparently intrigued the Pharisees, as seen in their questioning. The life that Jesus lived allows us, as ordinary followers , to capture his nature- meditate on it, embrace it, reflect it and live it. So what can we reflect in this circumstance? We can acquire a lifestyle model of making eternal investments and discovering true evangelism of the gospel of Christ. Dinner with a sinner. All around us are people who need to know Jesus, desperately, and are truly missing hope, peace, salvation, worth, freedom, healing, etc. People all over the world need the real Jesus... the Jesus that ate with sinners, that shared His love by daily laying down his life and by pouring out all he had far beyond man-made barriers, traditions, and physical limitations. Sometimes knowing the amount of lost people, the great amount of people in nations who have never heard the gospel message or who are the least evangelized, seeing poverty stricken people, the hurt, wounded, broken, bound, addicts, or even those whose crutch is man-made traditions, is... well overwhelming. So with this overwhelming factor of the world, where do we start. Jesus left the 99 to go after the 1. We can begin by investing in the one(s) around us. When God puts something in your heart, it is very much alive, a heartbeat causes your body to respond. The heartbeat of God in a willing vessel will cause one thing: action. Sometimes it's so easy to get wrong ideas about how things are supposed to look like or how they are even supposed to function. For instance, sometimes in our ohhh so human minds, it's easy to think that the things of God have to be embellished with something of "our own" when in reality He ministers in power according to His will and normally a lot more simple but amazing than we expect. So, dinner with a sinner- One person at a time: Reaching out to the people around you, sharing the hope you have with another, displaying the life changing, unselfish, amazing, distinct Love of Christ.  Jesus reached out to me when I thought I was unreachable. His love met me at the place where I was a sinner and He embraced me there and my life changed. As you pray and know the heart of God, He reveals people around you that need Him. When God shows you this person, or people be their friend and build a relationship with them. Get to know them and follow God's lead with them. "Dinner with a sinner", or befriending an individual who needs Jesus will allow the nature of God to naturally flow through those who follow Him and the people who are being reached out to will see something different. That difference is of course Jesus. As a Christian, we are all called to live a life or mission. A mission of following God on the journey in daily obedience and seeing the world as He does will allow you to impact others and take part of the work He has started. The harvest isn't an event that will take place one day or in the future, the harvest is now for those who are willing to see it. One day at a time, one obedient act at a time, one individual coming to know Christ at a time... what a life to live, daily encountering God to know Him more and in return make Him known by pouring yourself out into those around you, and to wherever the journey leads you. Jesus truly saw the worth in each individual He encountered on His journey and He even knew the worth of every person ever created thus He gave all. By seeing with the eyes of God, we can see the worth in people we encounter, because underneath it all, each person has the value that is seen in the life and death of our one true Savior, Jesus. Worth shouldn't be questioned, when Jesus gave His life for all, so they may know Him. May the mission of God be branded on our hearts and sealed in our lives as we reach out those around us.

All access---Love!

It's amazing to know that God, is never unavailable and never too distant for us. The God of  all creation is not too far out of reach and we have all access to Him through the work of the cross. It's a captivating thought to understand that God created us and desires to be in relationship with us. He doesn't require it, but through the life of Jesus we see that God gave everything so that we could be reconciled back to Him. Nothing compares to the love of God. Who knows you better than the one that created you? No one knows the depth that God put inside of you before he formed you, except Him. God takes the time to be with us, to commune with us. In the garden, prior to the Fall of Man, the world was"one" with God. After the fall of man, we had to live in the curse of sin, which separates us from our maker. Jesus reconciled that gap by being born of a virgin, living a life to exhibit who God was, and then die a cruel death on the cross, to then overcome death and sin. Because of this, God is ever-present and we have all access to Him in our lives. Each day, I can wake up and come to God through grace to know Him, talk to Him, and daily encounter Him. This is life changing to catch the revelation that God loves to spend time with His children. He invests in us and goes to the depths to rescue us in this life! God's goodness never ends, his grace is not limited, and His time is not like ours. He is everywhere, always! Inside of each person is a divine plan, that God placed in us. The Bible says that we were created in His image, so somewhere in us despite our worldliness, is characteristics of God. When we begin to search after God to know Him more, His characteristics, His heart, and His plan for our lives begins to surface. When your life is turned over to your Savior, you begin to walk in you really are! At this point, you realize your life isn't your own, but that we belong to God! Perspectives on life begin to change, and you realize that each day counts! Knowing who God is, asks that we live every day on purpose. Embracing the heart of God and living a life accordingly is a full life. Love begins in us, by knowing the love of Christ and it's then spread to those around us. God's heart is zealous for the world, that includes us and all people, of every nation, race, language.etc.  The sincere love of God reached us at our lowest points, so the love of God in us will reach the world around us! It takes no specific equation to be in relationship with God, but that you allow realize that forgiveness for all sin, is in the work of Christ and that He is lord and Savior...We were created to know God, find out who we are in Him, and live a life to make Him known. I'm definitely thankful that every day I can experience God and live a life for Him.. there's no greater life!

Make the Day Count!

On most jobs people do what they must do in order to provide proof of hours worked in order to gain their wages for the time spent on the job. You can almost visualize 90% of our society running into the office after a very hectic morning, to make it to the time clock so they can clock in on time, and then at the end of the day they anxiously await the clock to roll over from 4:59 to 5:00 so they can clock out for an afternoon of relaxation.
We live in a fast paced environment and clocking in/clocking out is the norm for the working crowd. Unfortunately, sometimes "clocking in and clocking out" rolls over from just our jobs or other obligations in life to our relationship with God and what He wants to do through us.Thankfully God never takes a break to stop doing His work in my life or from fulfilling His purposes in the world, because my life would probably be wrecked.
The bible says in Ecclesiastes 3:11:He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end.

When we get to the place that we realize God is always at work in our individual lives, for us and with us, and also at work in the lives around us it's easy to see that He never takes a break and that as He works for eternal purposes, that we should also work for the eternal purposes in life. God has set eternity in our hearts and although we spend each day walking on the earth, surrounded by the temporary, we are still on eternal time meaning everything we do now will make an eternal difference. While we may think that we have things to do according to our own agenda, our personal plans, goals, "stresses", etc, what we are actually living in this lifetime is on God's time. With the amazing revelation that God fights for us our entire life and created us for Him to be in relationship with Him and live for Him, revolutionizes the way we view "time" here on earth. The simple fact of knowing we don't choose Him, but He chooses us and places destiny in our lives, handpicking us while we were even in our mothers wombs, shows me that my time is not my own and the "time" I consider lengthy is but a moment to my savior in comparison to eternity. So, knowing eternity is in my heart and every moment can count for something great, it causes my walk to be different, my talk to be different. This revelation allows you to see from a greater perspective and rearranges your life, so that you position yourself to daily make your life count for something. Making the day count doesn't necessarily mean doing the most grand of things, but God will put you in a place in your life surrounded by people who need to know Him. That's a way to make the day count, that's away to make the hours, minutes, and seconds count. Praying and seeking God on behalf of His people will result in God sharing his compassion for people with you. At this point your heart will begin to break for the things His breaks for, the lost, hurting, idolaters, sick, poor, the lady at the grocery store, or the guy you always see whose eyes show emptiness. Living a life of impact can start with where you are, and count for all eternity. Loving people as Jesus showed His love for you counts for eternity. It doesn't take some magnificent equation, but a daily obedience to God's voice and willingness to lay down your life for those around you! That changes the course of man-kind greater than any event ever could. Everyday=Eternity, we are living it now, and from the moment we accepted Jesus as Lord and Savior eternity set in our hearts and the clock began ticking to do the will of the one who Sent us. Everyday at that point our lives had the potential to really count for something. Jesus on his life journey, poured Himself out every single day, whether it was investing in the disciples, ministering to the crowds, sharing with the Pharisees, who would misunderstand Him, feeding the hungry, healing the sick, and loosing the bound. What an extraordinary life that throughout His entire life He exhausted all He had, poured out all He was to the people He daily came in contact with, no matter where He was. Eternity was set in His heart. In the final moments of His life, when Jesus was on the cross He bridged the gap due to sin that separated the Father from man-kind,  He paid the price for our sins, and then as He was ressurected, defeating all the enemie's tactics and giving us opportunity for new life. Because of His entire life and because of the mighty work of the cross and ressurection, He made a way for eternity to be set in our hearts. How different would our lives be like if we knew everyday was not our own, but a day to do the will of the one who sent us. How different would the world around us be, if this wasn't only a thought, but a mindset to which a lifestyle followed. His kingdom work is being fulfilled all around us, and by asking Him to allow us to be a part we can be a mighty part in the work He began. Daily obedience, living everyday for eternal purposes will not only change us, the world around us, but bring honor to God, because this is His heart.With the technology we have, an email can be sent in a second, a text message can be sent in a second.. it is all very fast paced. With a second what kind of impact can we make? With our time what kind of eternal investments can we make? No spiritual clocking in and clocking out, but using the 86,400 seconds in your day to know God, hear Him, and make Him known... living a life reflecting the Father can never stop.

Superstar instead of Just Enough

We have always heard that God is more than enough and that He is all sufficient in nature, and that's simply who our Savior is. He is able to supply all that we need, from salvation to every physical and spiritual. God is more than enough to fill the emotional voids in our life with His presence. He is more than enough for everyone who believes He is so and this is 100% true. But why do so many of us act differently and have a relationship with God like He is not enough?  We have been conditioned to have a "superstar" mentality of Jesus, thus producing a deficient relationship with God rather than Him being just enough. If you look back over the new testament when Jesus came on the scene and began discipling, changing the platform, performing miracles, setting the pace, and ministering to the crowds, you will notice that often times he had crowds following him everywhere and it almost seems like they were bombarding him. Often times Jesus would try to escape them in order to seek a place of solitude, but everywhere Jesus went He always noticed those who were of sincere faith. Ex, in the midst of the crowd He realized the woman who touched him with the issue of blood. Many flocked to Jesus as onlookers or observers of his miracles, and basically they were his crazed fans.
Have you ever watched the E! channel or seen someone who is obsessed with celebrities, it's awkwardly funny how they follow so many actors and actresses and refer to them by first name and talk about their life as if they are friends. Well this is a crazed fan and in many cases, a lot of the crowds that witnessed Jesus were this exactly. Many were changed, transformed, healed, delivered, raised from the dead, and saved but it seems like not everyone in the crowd were actually interested in who Jesus was but they wanted to see Him perform over and over again. I can see it now, "Oh cool Jesus do that again" Almost like an instant replay on our DVR's. We tend to establish and base our relationship with God on that one time God did something really cool in our life or that one time He performed really awesome (He showed up in a service) and our entire relationship cannot be founded on a performance. With this mentality it puts us in danger of getting bored with our relationship, just like at the movies or anywhere else. When we  feel like God hasn't performed it's easy to be done, feel like we did something wrong. It's easy to not press into His presence, or not pray or read our word. When the entire time, as a child of God in order to be filled by God we should have the expectant heart that He is more than enough. His presence, His word, a prayer time is more than enough. It doesn't take some thrill seeking, over the edge, top notch performance for us to know God, it takes daily relationship and that is something that is satisfying and that will allow us to be firmly planted and grounded in who God really is and allow us to be most effective in our individual walks and as the body of Christ. It's unfortunate for an individual to base their entire relationship with Jesus based on the fact that He performs in "superstar" mode constantly rather than the fact that He is daily abundant; however, it's an even greater misfortune that the Body of Christ has got away from the simplicity of the importance of the presence of God and "set the stage" for a more superstar presence. (I'm definitely not a church basher, but the church is made up of individuals and if every person is like me then they have person work that can be done and viewpoints that can be changed in order to get back to the basics of the gospel)! Recognizing this will change our mindsets and change our connection with God. It will cause a shift in how we perceive God personally and corporately, by daily realizing that He is enough. Rather than expecting Him to perform, He can be enough daily to us. This will bring us back to being one with God and experiencing Him in ways that are powerful and effective. Knowing God is more than enough is life changing and prevents us from have a roller coaster relationship with  God, who is constant.

The woman was a Greek, a Syro-Phoenician by birth, and she kept asking Him to cast the demon out of her daughter.  But Jesus said to her, “Let the children be filled first, for it is not good to take the children’s bread and throw it to the little dogs.”
 And she answered and said to Him, “Yes, Lord, yet even the little dogs under the table eat from the children’s crumbs.”  Mark 7:26-28


This woman approached Jesus, even though she was a gentile, and she showed her faith in her response to Jesus. She recognized that Jesus was enough to set her daughter free, but that all she needed was just a tiny bit of Him and even in that tiny bit or crumb then she would still receive and over abundance from Him. 
Often times when we (I), bring our problems to God we need something huge to happen and it's honestly hard to satisfy us. Surely our crumb would not satisfy our problems, we would need an entire feast to deal with our struggle. 
Simply put, Jesus is more than enough. It's inherent to who He is, but we have been so conditioned to view Him as more of a performer, but how different would our personal relationship with Jesus be, along with our witness, if we just allowed Him to be more than enough in our life, seeing Him as the abundant God that His is rather than waiting for the superstar Jesus to come blow our problems away and sustain us for 20 minutes!  
Jesus gave until He had no more to give and in this shows His abundance to those who love and trust Him. He  is faithful to those who are faithful and even when we walk away, He is still faithful to hang around. Unlike most people, He is willing to go any depth or height for humanity. He is the antidote to the lost, He is what the hurting long for, and He is victory over in and every situation no matter how great or small. He is daily more than enough for us! If you notice Jesus gave out of His brokenness. He was at the most broken place in His life for humanity and facing what He knew would be a very trying time as He prayed in the garden of Gethsemane yet as He came near the end of His life He gave all that He had. Out of His sacrifice, He became more than enough on so many levels to all mankind. When we are broken we expect, expect, expect, instead of give as He did.

Now Jesus sat opposite the treasury and saw how the people put money into the treasury. And many who wererich put in much. Then one poor widow came and threw in two mites,^[j] which make a quadrans.  So He called His disciples to Himself and said to them, “Assuredly, I say to you that this poor widow has put in more than all those who have given to the treasury;  for they all put in out of their abundance, but she out of her poverty put in all that she had, her whole livelihood.”Mark 12:41-44


This story contains so much depth, but one thing to notice is that this story is about a widow who gave. Widows are are normally broken and out of that place in her life, she gave all that she had to the Lord. She knew His worth and she knew that it was more about a performance based relationship, but she knew that He was more than enough, so she could give everything in return! 

Jesus is all we need. 

Encountering Jesus Firsthand

Speaking for myself, often times in my life I have relied on others' relationship with God at certain times rather than making the appropriate sacrifices in order to have my own personal fellowship with the Lord. In ways, this has caused me to have many secondhand experiences of God and few firsthand experiences with God. Secondhand experiences causes one to rely on others, but also causes the perception of God to be limited to the person or persons in which you rely on. Secondhand experiences due to limitations produce lack in several areas such as a lack of understanding, relationship, freedom, fullness, purpose, vision, and identity of who God is and who we are in Christ. Having a limited view of God effects every part of our walk with him. It's imperative that we encounter Jesus firsthand, and on a regular basis in order to abide in the relationship that he desires with you and in order to capture/walk in the purpose that He has designed for you. 

Who encountered Jesus firsthand on a daily basis? His disciples- the 12 that traveled with him, that were real with him, saw His miracles, saw His compassion,were loved by him, were commissioned by Him, who was led by him, taught by Him, who were corrected by Him, who saw Him crucified and resurrected, and who(for the most part) took on the burden and purpose of Christ.

So to dive into the life of the disciples to see what Jesus showed them, what He taught them, what purpose He was instilling within them. When Jesus entered the scene, what did He bring?

-What was the life of Jesus like in the gospels?
-What was he showing the disciples to do?
- What was he paving the way for believers in the New Testament church to apply to their daily life?

We are called to make a difference as a Christian, and as a disciple of Christ, and with small disciplines applied to our lives we can have an internal change that we have an outward effect on those around us.
Our lives are never meant to be a mundane life, but ones filled with purposes, loving God, taking on a kingdom mindset, loving as Jesus loved, embracing Faith challenges, living a life above reproach, pulling those around us in, being transformed, and a living a life of obedience as well as so much more.
Who to better learn but by THE example Himself. Jesus.

It's time to revolutionize who I am in order to be more like Jesus so that He can be shown to the lost.

Day 1.
Mark 1:1-45
(In summary)
When Jesus called the first disciples (14-20) Jesus told the disciples to follow him and that He would make them fishers of men. At once they left their nets and followed him.

In relation to us today our "nets" could be anything that we hold onto in life, but when we are saved it's necessary that we let go of the worldly things we hold onto because God has bigger plans for our life.
Jesus wants to entrust with His children his heart for mankind, by making us fishers of men. He wants us to go after those who are lost, by being witnesses. Letting our own nets go, making personal sacrifices, and becoming eternally minded, reaching those around us.

(21-27)
When Jesus preached, He preached in such a way that people were compelled because no one had preached in that manner of authority before. It was evident that Jesus walked in a power unlike anyone else had every had.
Because we are also of God, we have the potential to allow God to work through us in this same capacity to where hearers recognize that we are set apart for God's purpose.

(40-45)
At this point a leper came to Jesus and begged to be healed. Jesus was moved with compassion and  reached out and touched the leper to heal him. Jesus could have done anything to heal him, but he touched him.
This, to me, says that Jesus goes beyond the natural man-made barriers and does things we are not capable in ourselves to do, but also goes beyond the confinements and limitations that man has made.

These principles can be applied to our daily lives as disciples to transform our mindsets so that we can become more Christ-minded in our lives.
Because we as Christians are born of God, we possess a unique power that when we speak, people are compelled to listen.
We are called to reach those around us, and can tear down the barriers that have been set up by men!

When the word of God is applied to our daily life, things change within us and around us.

When reality and dreams collide

Imagination allows me to see the things that could never be
reality reminds me invariably that it holds the key
the only escape is to close my eyes 
to transpose the lies
into something more real
so real
that I can even feel
the magic when unified 
maybe to some, it's undignified
but at least I'm undone
when with you, everything is won
no cares in the world, no matter to tend
I'm just a girl,  lost in the wind
blown away by everything You are
to close my eyes and what was  far
is now near, embracing, heart is racing
this is it finally, no more spacing
because I am
I am
complete, I am disengaged
by this plague
of giving away the most precious of parts
to you I have given my heart
rather it be in your hands
than in reality's droning plans
if only
why only
is reality the way
can't this dream, please stay
until it becomes possible
I escape to the place where impossible
BECOMES reality. 
when dreams meet reality
danger strikes but set's my spirit free
now's the time to go away
and in your beautiful emanation I will stay

Faith solves the Roller Coaster Ride!

I guess it's true, what the first chapter of James talks about! Sometimes you wan't to wonder why on earth James would say, Consider it Joy when you face various trials. Does that sound sane to most? Probably not, consider it joy when things get tough. Is that a message people want to hear during the most trying times of their lives or during hard/uncertain/uncomfortable situations? More than likely not, but this is what James goes on to say-

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds,  because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.  Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.  If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.  But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.  Those who doubt should not think they will receive anything from the Lord; 8 they are double-minded and unstable in all they do." James 1:1-7

This speaks volumes, more so for the believer than non believer, but speaks to all people alike. In summary trials birth something. Trials birth faith, because when circumstances are huge and nothing is possible by men, but only possible by God, the mustard seed of faith is grown. To each individual God gives us a measure of faith to believe, but if it's not stretched we will always have the same measure. It's like given the alphabet, but if never asked to learn to read, we will never put it to use. Something along those lines. But when trials come look to the positive side of things because, it requires a. either our faith to grow b. become angry or disappointed. The bible discusses many people who had faith, but if you notice a lot of people had to be committed to their beliefs, even when they didn't see it, it was there. That's against our nature, but it can become our nature through trust and seeing outside our circumstances. There comes a point when we have to realize that God is simply just bigger than what we are facing. Then after believing faith will be grown, and that   it will tag on to you an amount of maturity. Faith equals faithfulness on our part. If we have faith to believe we will continue to believe which is also faithfulness or commitment. We won't be up and down. Personally I like how James goes on to say when you doubt you are double minded, you are like a wave and the sea blown and tossed by the wind.(paraphrased). What does this say to me? It speaks a lot to me. There are days when my faith rules out my vision, but there are days when my flesh does. What does this produce? A rocky roller coaster, just like James said, blown and tossed by the wind. One day I am on a high, believing God's salvation, believing God for victory, believing God for healing, believing God's promises, the next day on a low, believing lies of the enemy, believing my circumstance, believing in my good (or not so good) works. This is an example of a spiritual roller coaster, spiritual up's and down's. Too many times, myself, and I'm sure others become the double minded man, blown and tossed by the wind. What does that mean exactly? To me it says that when we don't have full faith in God, which means we doubt, that we are controlled by our circumstances, they govern and dictate our mindsets, day, personality, everything. Doubting, equals a wild up and down ride. Christian bi-polar disorder, visiting the north and south poles. One day positive, next day negative. The doubting man, unstable in ALL his ways. That's why trust and faith in God is so important, doesn't mean every day is going to be the greatest day, but it does mean that we can remain constant, because His promises are constant. When things look tough, we can know that specific gloom and doom isn't everything, it's not our future, not our purpose, not who we are, not the way things have to go. We can believe beyond what everything is screaming out to be. Jesus said, I am the Way, the Truth and the Life. His promises are real and when faced with hard times, it is crucial to believe on those things that are above, those things that are true, those things that are of eternal worth, because then we will show ardent faith to the world, they won't see unstable Christians, believing doubting, and repeat. we are not to be like instructions on the back of the shampoo bottle that says, lather, rinse and repeat, but we are to believe, believe, believe. Lot's of difference. I need help to not be a bi-polar Christian, people who I am a witness to obviously get really confused when I am happy go lucky faith gung-ho and then the next day acting like an eeyore (depressed, self piteous animal on winnie the pooh) or something! The last few weeks have been hard, financially, physically, and spiritually. So pretty much everything around me has been a little hay wire, today I just choose to breathe and know that God has big plans for the Women of Worship conference tomorrow and the next day and the next day after that, and that circumstance seriously doesn't define who Carrie Tucker is (or whatever person is reading this), but it only grows my faith if I allow it. These hard and trying times are helping me to become a more faithful believer in Jesus Christ, and to the Faithful, He (God) is faithful! (scripture somewhere in the O.T, psalms maybe)! So like the Rita Springer song says, I have to believe for healing and that God will supply all of my needs! Someone once told me that if I take care of God's business, then He will take care of mine. Yesterday I was reading in a Joyce Meyer's book about how God takes care of birds. Birds has a need in order to live, but they don't go around worrying all the time, they just praise God and he takes care of them. Wow, if He does that, then He must want to take care of those people who He was in pain for, died for, persecuted for, lived for, and intercedes for. How much more does He love His kids and want to take care of them. So today, I just stand, saying God is going to heal me or make a provision for something to happen and that all things work together for the good of those who Love God and Who are called according to His purpose, notice that is ALL things, not some, but everything will work out. Faith is being stretched, maturity is the reward, and double-mindedness is being weeded out, that's joy right there. I can say now that I agree with what James was saying. I count it all joy!

Jesus, I ask more than anything you help me not to be double minded. Help me not to be spiritually bi-polar, showing the world instability as a Christian. Help me to let my faith grow when you want it to. Help me to play on the offensive side rather than the defensive side. I believe you for healing, because you gave me this head and you can take care of it! Thanks for helping me realize things and for letting me be on the winning side of the game!

12 Blessed are those who persevere under trial, because when they have stood the test, they will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.

Wheel chair

A lot of us have failures and flaws that take place in our lives, often times more than we would like. Because we are carnal, we have weaknesses about us, some that hinder us and some that push us forward. Although it's fact we all mess up, there is a difference between making a mistake and living through our weaknesses and failures. There are some unnecessary things in our lives that we tend to rely on rather than the one we are supposed to rely on. I guess that's one of my biggest weaknesses, that I rely on so many other things rather than the One who can fully handle 'all my stuff.' Earlier today I saw a man in a wheel chair and I thought to myself of all the trials and limits he must face living in that wheel chair. First before it's taken offensively, I think people who are physically in a wheel chair but choose to do all the things they can do in spite of the crippling, are some awesome people. Anyways, I thought to myself about how the man has to rely on the wheel chair in place of legs to transport him. From the time he wakes up he needs the wheel chair and all throughout the day he needs it. Normal activity like taking a shower, using the restroom, going to class, having a job, going to the store, driving, and many more things are altered due to the inability of his legs. Because of that, he is fully reliant upon that wheel chair. In most cases people who need a wheel chair cannot help their situation. I have heard of stories of people who choose the wheel chair over "intense" physical therapy to get them going. In our lives from a spiritual and emotion aspect, we have wheel chairs. Things that we rely on rather than the "legs" being God, which we were created to depend on. A spiritual wheel chair limits us from what God wants us to do and limits what God wants to do in us. Whether it was just some cruddy times in life, hurt from others, weaknesses/failures that caused so much guilt, mindsets, sin, or complacency, we allow those things to take the place of God and become what we rely on. Hindrance, is a huge deal. Limits are a huge deal. I don't want to constantly let things hinder me from God, especially when they are things that I, Carrie Tucker, am in control in. It's like trying to live for God and Him calling me to walk, but I'm sitting in my wheel chair saying, "okay God, I'm coming.. I can't walk, don't know why I cannot, but I'm coming!" Still I don't think, actually I know that God doesn't want me to be limitless, if that were the case then the work on the cross would have some "but's or if only's" at the end of the clause. Instead, my bible and everyone I have read simply says, It is finished, not it is finished... but or It is finished, if only. So why stay in the wheel chair. Personally I feel like I have several things that hinder me from living fully. I can't exactly put my finger on it, I just know that I don't want to continue on living a hindered lifestyle. I don't want to get to heaven and Jesus ask me why I didn't live for what He paid for. Nor, do I want to use my "legs" for the first time when I enter the gates. Things occur from being in a wheel chair to long, from lack or use of muscles. A process called atrophy takes place, deterioration, degeneration, weakening. We think we are weak but after relying on and having a wheel chair mindset and lifestyle, we deteriorate more. Deterioration due to not working it out (in this case surrendering who we are and who we are not, praying, reading, seeking). When we are apathetic we can't expect to be free. When we are complacent we can't expect to be free. Sometimes there are times where your brother will take you and drop you down into the house so Jesus can heal you, but most of the time with your own faith you have to press through the crowd, crippled and all to get what you need.(both examples from parables in the gospels). We have people to help us, but sometimes we have to trust God, shake the wheel chair, and go after Him. I make things hard like most people do, somewhat like the Isreallites who made an 11 day journey in 40 years. Even though 2+2=4, I have to know the logic, the why's the what if's the but's and thou's, just to be sure, that's one of my wheel chairs. We all have our own personal ones, specialized just for us. I wan't to work this out though, work out these atrophied places, no matter how weak I may feel or it may seem. No matter how uncomfortable it may be or whether I feel like it or not, I wanna trash my wheel chairs, my unnecessary hindrances and live not through that wheel chair which easily becomes IDENTITY, but let Christ identify me.

A rubiks cube would be easier than this...

Frustration seems to be one step away from discouragement in a majority of situations. A lot of people walk through different seasons, struggles, or situations, but I so happen to constantly walk in frustration for whatever reason I don't know. Frustration involving trying to figure things out only leads to confusion and searching out the human logic. Frustration is literally like being in a "wheelchair" and never fully being able to enjoy freedom. Not too mention the confusion part, because that intensifies frustration. So maybe my answer is why? or what next? or what can I do to not have this unwelcome tag-a-long. What can I do to change this thing that has always been there? Hmm, this is why a majority of times taking that Rubik' cube would be easier, trivial, but easier. All I would have to do is line up the colors. Wow, but how to do that to myself? I am really hoping that something different, so different than anything I have ever experienced before is right around the corner!

sixty seconds

Well it's 2010, a new year, new beginning, a start to something else. Somehow between the minute turnover from 11:59pm 12/31/09, until 12:00 am 1/1/10, the sixty seconds brings a hopefulness that the next year can be different and even better than the last twelve months of the previous year. It's really a neat thing that people all over the world make new goals and reach for new heights in their lives. The aspirations depend on the individual and to each their own circumstances. In that sixty seconds we realize 2010, or the marking of a new year is a place for fresh starts. I love fresh starts, face it we all do. I love knowing that yesterdays mistakes, flaws, failures, and mishaps don't have to carry over into a new day or even a new year. I guess one thing though for sure I have realized is nothing changes in that sixty seconds unless I change. Goals are not met unless we make a change, and not change big all at one time but just ..... step. A lot of times I picture change as this amazing transformation, like I am literally a mighty "morphing" power ranger. Change as this amazing 360 degree turn in a matter of seconds. Sure change can occur for better or worse in a matter of seconds, we can open up an envelope and realize we randomly won a million dollars in a matter of seconds, or in a matter of seconds we can rear end the guy ahead of us and both situations present change in our lives. However, change in lifestyle is kind of like a step. Say we are climbing some stairs to get from where we are to where we are going. It's a lot of stairs, several flights of stairs. You go from the bottom level to the first stair, and you think to yourself... wow, I haven't changed a bit, but in all reality you are higher than you were. Then to the third, and fourth and so on. Change is an occurring thing, but during the climb we may not recognize it. The important thing to recognize, is just because you automatically have not transformed into your "goal" person or achieved your greatest achievements in a day, doesn't mean you are not reaching. I know a lot of times, because I don't hit my goal with one try I get discouraged, but what I don't realize is in the climb I am changing. With one step, even if I am only 1 inch higher than I was before, I am one inch closer than what I was to reaching my destination. In the matter of sixty seconds we have before the new year is brought in, sometimes we expect to wake up the next day and automatically be different, be a better person, be thinner, get paid more, be happier, be healthier, be cleaner, be more studious. We expect to be, but not do in order to be. I know that's weird wording. But I sometimes just expect without every doing anything. I guess I just want to start taking the little steps in my life that equal the big picture instead of just wondering why I never get the big picture with out making a little mark on the paper. Do I have goals, of course! Do I hope for the future, sure I do. Instead of just hoping and just dreaming, I want to walk those goals out daily. Daily reaching, daily striving. I do hope greater things occur in 2010. I want to grab hold of victories in my own life that I have never walked in and put my hands on the things that are mine and that I want in life. I have to Move TOward those things in order to grab hold of it. Instead of always wanting, I want to be. Instead of wanting to be intimate with God and hoping for it, I want to BE intimate with Him. Instead of hoping to be used by Him, I want to be used by Him. so in order to have such things, I should walk in it! I have been thinking about the story of Cain and Able and some things I have heard about them before. God was pleased when Able brought his offering of the firstborn. He just brought his very best. I understand that everyday my best will not be given to the Lord because I fail, but I am thankful that I walk in grace. Everyday I want to strive to please God, but the difference between then and now, is I please God through the blood of Jesus that covers me. I recently heard something that I think gave me knew knowledge and knew freedoms in my life and it was that, it's easy to become condition centered instead of position centered. Condition centered meaning your daily spiritual walk with God over your position that He made for you. Being concerned about the condition of your walk is very important, should not be neglected, and should be the number one priority in our day to day events. However sometimes focusing on where we are not presents and open door that the enemy come in and discourage us, but waking up every day knowing we are positioned as sons or daughters of God, pleasing Him through the blood of Jesus, abiding in Him as child and not slave, living freely and in love, and just "being" in His presence is very important to remember also. Condition changes, but when we are saved our position never will. I daily want to remember my position and not be discouraged by where my condition is or is not. I do want things to change in me, one just knowing my position and knowing that it is based on nothing I do. Secondly I want my condition to improve. I want old baggage to be gone and daily just spend time with God and be a witness to people around me. These are two goals that are small. They are DAILY steps but overall it will change everything about me, my views, my ways, and the people around me. There will be good days and there will be bad days. Whatever it is I want to go about it and make that day count. I want to make the moments count, make my day count, smile at people who need to be smiled at. Hold doors for ppl and talk to ppl. I want to drink coffee and read my bible and let my entire world world to be rocked and changed. Daily changed, daily transforming, daily yearning. Different than ever before because I want change and I'm not going to wait for one big moment, but enjoy the little moments that make up big experiences. What a journey, some days warm and sunny, some cold and rainy, but all in all it's a journey and a journey greater than me. I walk a journey to know the One who created the most miraculous and detailed of creations. It took men years and several tries to create a light bulb, but ALL of this was created in only a week. We can't even handle our small day to day tasks and get everything done in the week that we need done, but God created the entire earth. Galaxies, planets, mountains, trees, deserts, valleys, rivers, oceans, butterflies, ants, gnats, centipedes, and the human who in itself should have taken 2,000,000,000 years to create because of it's mechanics and detail. The God who created all of that has chosen me to take such a journey to know Him, to be His daughter, His disciple. Then to share such a wonder with many people. 2010 is going to be a good year, now to just walk towards all the goals. Remember that 60 doesn't change anything but time, unless we decide to change. Journey, moving forward one step at a time. In the words of a pop star, It's the climb!